Finding My Inner Goddess

first run of the new year

2012-01-06T10:45:00.005-05:00

Duration: 44:21
Distance: 3.11 mi
Pace: 14'14"
Calories: 544

MILE TIME AVG. PACE
1 13:41 13'41"/mi
2 27:51 14'10"/mi
3 42:34 14'43"/mi

Considering I've not run since November 29th, and still managed to come in right around my normal 5K time, I'm pleased. My back was a bit sore from injuring it on Sunday, but I feel stronger having run through it. We'll see if I still feel stronger in a few hours!

I've set a Nike+ goal to run 200 miles in 2012. I'm not sure how feasible that is if I take up roller derby instead of running. I only ran 145 miles in 2011, and I did four half marathons. So 200 may be completely unrealistic. But hey, it gives me a carrot to chase. Anyway, it breaks down to less than 4 miles per week. There's no reason why I can't get a four mile run in each week.

new year, time to get into gear

2012-01-05T21:27:00.003-05:00

I completely slacked off for Christmas and New Years Eve, and since I injured my back on Sunday, putting away Christmas decorations, I've been completely useless all week this week. However, when I weighed myself at Publix on Wednesday night, I weighed in at 233. So I gained two pounds over the holiday. All things considered, that's not terrible.

I'm hoping my back feels better in the morning; it's my free Friday and I'd like to get a short run in the books.

I won't resume lifting weights until Sunday. And that really will depend on how my back ache is doing. It's been bad this week.

In other news, Monday night I went to a recruitment meeting for our local roller derby teams. I'm going to start attending practices. If I like it, if we can find a way to afford it, and if I survive their two month audition-type-thing, perhaps I'll take up roller derby. That would be a heck of a work out. Roughly 4.5-5 hours of skating each week (two practices per week). I'd like to be a roller derby girl!

A final thought: the Livestrong app made some changes. It's much nicer now.

success and failure

2011-12-22T10:48:00.003-05:00

Last week, I only lifted my weights and did my crunches three out of five nights. With two nights of jumping rope.

And one night of speed walking a theme park, for good measure. I'm amazed at how much we accomplished in just three hours at Disney.

This week, I won't lie, I have not yet exercised. I won't make excuses. I could find the time if I tried. Though Monday night I gave blood, and they advised no strenuous activity for a few days, and today is the first day I'm feeling better after being completely exhausted from the blood letting.

However... I weighed myself at Publix last night... 231! Down two pounds from last week, and six total since November 5th. Yay!

jumping rope

2011-12-14T21:30:00.001-05:00

Just finished my second night in a row of jumping rope. Good gravy that's exhausting! Last night I jumped roughly 220 times. Tonight, I jumped roughly 210 times.

I. Am. Beat.

But I'm trying to force motivation down my throat.

the truth is hideous

2011-12-13T19:17:00.005-05:00

Renee has been very honest about her weight over on her blog. I will be honest, too. Even though the truth is frightening and ugly.

I don't own a scale, so when I weigh myself, I have to haul my fat ass onto the very public scale in the lobby of my local Publix. It can be humiliating if people are around, so I don't do it often. But I will try to do so once a month. I take my measurements more regularly, though, so I'll have to start journaling them on here.

On Saturday, November 5th, I weighed in at 237.

That is unbelievable. I don't think I look like what 237 should look like.

Tonight, I weighed myself again. I weighed in at 233.

I'm down 4 pounds in just over 5 weeks. I'll take it. Especially since I haven't really been trying, just ever so slightly increasing my exercising.

I'm trying to get my thinking turned around, and then once the holidays are over, I'm kicking it into top gear.

Hips: 46.25"
Waist: 42.5"
R Thigh: 26.5" (down .5)
L Thigh: 26.5" (down .5)
R Calf: 18.5"
L Calf: 18.5"
R Biceps: 14"
L Biceps: 14"
Bust: 44.5"

there's an app for that

2011-12-13T09:37:00.002-05:00

Last night, I downloaded the Livestrong app for my iPad. I set up an account, and entered everything I consumed yesterday. The good news: it was under 2,000 calories for the entire day. The bad news: my exercise routine burns less than 100 calories per day. It's an approximation, as I couldn't figure out how to properly name my exercises to get their calories to turn up. So I called my crunches "stretches" and my dumbells something else.

I'm going to try to be good about tracking my comestibles. But this is a rough, rough time of year to start this! I came to work today and was given a tin of cookies. COOKIES!!!!

Ugh.

I think I'm going to give up hard liquor. I'll still allow myself wine and beer, but in moderation. I've already cut back on those. Giving up a martini, though, will be a challenge, as my husband makes a fabulous martini, and I do so love to drink.

Weeks 4&5: Nov 27 - Dec 7

2011-12-13T09:35:00.001-05:00

Week 4 was a partial success. I think I missed one night.

Week 5 was not very successful. I think I missed two nights.

Life has been a bit chaotic, and I didn't make meeting my goal a priority.

Space Coast Half Marathon

2011-11-27T13:26:00.001-05:00

It is finished. Four half marathons completed in 2011.

Week 4: Nov 20-24

2011-11-26T18:57:00.001-05:00

Week 4 Success! Five nights of weights, crunches, and squats!

Tomorrow morning, I'll be completing my fourth half marathon of 2011. Goal met!

Week 3: Nov 13-17

2011-11-18T09:11:00.002-05:00

Week 3 was a success! Five nights of lifting my dumbells.

Sunday, we did something like 6 hours of yard work. As a result, I could hardly move on Monday. It's made lifting my little weights really challenging. I've been so sore and tired all week.

The crunches/push ups were less successful this week. I only managed two out of five nights for those. See also: sore and exhausted. Next week I won't allow myself to make excuses, and I'll begin a five night a week goal for those, too.

I've not run or jumped rope at all this week. Other than the 7 miles I got in last Friday.

I have a half marathon on the 27th. That will be my fourth half this year. Hallelujah, I will meet that stupid goal.

Part of the journey to living a more active life is getting my brain engaged. Obviously I'm having a hard time convincing my brain that I need to be more active. It's a work in progress.

But I feel a little healthier this week, so there's that.

Week 2: Nov 6-10

2011-11-14T12:43:00.001-05:00

Week two was slightly less successful than week one, in that I did not meet my goal. I missed Wednesday night's weights and crunches. However, I walked Epcot that night, which proved exhausting.

Tuesday night I jumped rope. So there's that.

Friday morning, I walked 7 miles with a friend who is just not up for running yet.

jumping rope

2011-11-08T20:16:00.002-05:00

In 2003, leading up to my wedding, I lost many inches (but very few pounds) by lifting my dumbells, doing crunches, and jumping rope. If memory serves, I jumped rope 500 jumps nearly every night.

Tonight was night one of adding jump rope back into my routine.

Last week I did 5 nights of weights and crunches, as my goal dictates.

I'm at 2 nights so far this week, and will get that done tonight, too. I tend to do that just before bed. I've added push ups to my routine. It's exhausting. But I need to do it.

And I'll be adding rope jumping to the routine.

I only jumped 200 jumps tonight, and it nearly killed me. I'll try to increase my number each week until I hit 500 again.

Week 1: Oct 31 - Nov 3

2011-11-04T10:43:00.001-04:00

For the purposes of this new journey, a week shall encompass 5 days, Sunday through Thursday.

My goal: lift weights and do various squats and crunches 5 nights out of 7. I assume I won't do Friday and Saturday nights, as those tend to be too social to end in exercise.

Week 1: success! Five successive nights of weights and squats and crunches. Preceded by a half marathon.

Need to get running and jumping rope back into the mix.

all the runs I haven't posted

2009-10-20T18:29:00.006-04:00

Grrrr.... why do they keep messing with their site. Now I can't find how to share my runs.

Saturday, October 10th, Big Bertha
Distance: 5.5 miles
Duration: 1:29'07"
Pace: 16'03"/mile
Calories: 918

Monday, October 12th, St. Cloud -- running in sand
Distance: 2.67 miles
Duration: 42'26"
Pace: 15'59"/mile
Calories: 442

Saturday, October 17th, Kissimmee -- cold weather!
Distance: 6.36 miles
Duration: 1:31'10"
Pace: 14'19"/mile
Calories: 1,053

Monday, October 19th, St. Cloud -- walking in sand, leg issues, discovered iPod was on Pause most of the night
Distance: 1.29 miles
Duration: 20'07"
Pace: 15'30"/mile
Calories: 214

Tuesday, October 20th, home -- working through the leg pain, lots of walking
Distance: 4.26 miles
Duration: 1:04'31"
Pace: 15'08/mile
Calories: 704

I don't know why my legs are disgruntled. I have not the patience for this, especially with Big Bertha on the agenda for this weekend again.

::snicker::

2009-10-11T21:43:00.003-04:00

I got yelled at for my Facebook status! HA HA!

I have not had anything nice to say about my training on Saturday, so I won't blog about it except to say it was not what I set out for it to be.

I don't have the patience right now to grab all the usual info from the nike site. Perhaps another time.

I'm pretty sure my coach is trying to kill me

2009-10-05T20:40:00.004-04:00

I think my coach is trying to kill me, and I told him so.

Usually on Monday nights, I get to training early, and my coach is already there. He usually gets there around 430 and runs for an hour or so. Training begins at 630. I tend to get there around 6. I always have these grandiose ideas that I'll run a little before training begins, and it never happens. Tonight, coach was not running, which is highly unusual. He told me he wasn't feeling well, head ache, sore throat, general malaise. I told him about the migraine I had all day yesterday, and the residual headache I have had all day today was not great, but endurable.

Coach: That's okay, we'll take it easy today.
Me: ::laughing:: Riight. Your idea of taking it easy and my idea are completely different. You'll be all oh, we'll do an easy six mile run tonight and I'm more of a oh hey, there's the bar, let's go get a drink kind of girl.

Take it easy. Pshaw!

Coach doesn't want me to rely so heavily on the timer on my iPod. So, tonight, I put my iPod into the pocket on my fuel belt and trusted my coach. He said I would be surprised at how far I am actually able to run. I was skeptical; the trail has markers every quarter mile. I was certain my brain would know when I hit 1 mile and tell my legs it was time to walk. But, with my coach at my side the entire time; only one other person made it to training tonight, and he was taking it easy -- his easy is my agony -- so coach was with me the entire time. Five minutes into the run, coach told the other guy to walk for five minutes (he's just starting back after 2 weeks nursing an injury) while I kept running. Let me tell you how much I wanted to walk for five minutes! But coach kept me running. It was lightly raining, but the rain provided zero cooling relief; I was sweating like crazy. We reached the one mile mark and turned around (the trail ends at one mile, as the entire trail is only two miles long, and we started at mid-point). Coach kept me running, you know, because he's trying to kill me. According to the markers on the trail, coach let me walk just after 1.5 miles. It was 16 minutes of running.

Coach gave me five glorious minutes of walking. It felt like five seconds. Then, he decided to mix things up... for fun... because he's trying to kill me. We slow jogged for two minutes and then did fifty steps at a much faster pace. Two minutes slow jog, fifty steps fast. Ugh. The man is trying to kill me. After only two reps, I stopped being able to keep jogging, and started walking for two minutes. Coach was disappointed, I could tell, but I was beat.

At the end of the evening, coach told me he is seeing improvement in me. And I am trying to do better. For him. Because he believes in me, even though I don't. He's trying to get my head in shape, because my brain is holding me back. It is. But I guess I'm just not as concerned about that as he is. It's not as important for me to improve my pace as it is to my coach. So, I'll try to do better for him. Even though he's trying to kill me.

6 miles and an alligator

2009-10-03T12:28:00.005-04:00

Today's run was located in the same place our Monday night runs are. It's a path along a rather large lake. The trail is only two miles long, end to end, but there's a half mile extension away from the lake that we added on. So, we parked at one end, began the run, when we got to the extension thing, we turned onto it, half mile out and back, then back onto the lake trail. Turn around, come back, added the extension again, and finish. Six miles.

I slow ran the first mile, as has become the norm, before settling into a run 2 walk 1 ratio. Coach ran with me, and said something to the effect of, "I want to run with you and have you not use that thing (referring to my iPod, which I use to time my ratio)." He said he thinks the iPod is holding me back. Running is a mental sport, and I have trained my brain to think that my body is only capable of running for 2 minutes before it needs to walk. And that's what I do. He said he wants me to run more. He believes in me. I countered with telling him that ~~it's all his fault~~ he can take the credit for the fact that I will now run a full mile before walking. He laughed, and told me he's certain I can do more.

He's probably right.

And so, for my coach, this morning I tried to maintain a run 3 walk 1 ratio. And I did it for about two miles before I started feeling really tired. About that time, it was time for me to get onto the half mile extension. This path has very helpful markers every 1/8 of a mile. And so, for my coach and to challenge myself, I decided to run 1/8, and then walk 1/8 for that mile long extension (up and back equals a mile). But I didn't slow run it, I forced myself to run it at a faster pace than I normally would for the 1/8. I pushed myself, and flat out exhausted myself.

When my coach met back up with me, about .3 away from the finish, he wanted me to run to the end. I tried. I honestly tried. But I just couldn't make it, and ended up walking the final .15 or so. But I told him about the ways I had tried to push myself for the duration of my run, when he was not running with me. Because I did push myself.

I am tired now. Tired like I was after 10 mile runs last year. I need a nap. And it's because I pushed myself harder than I normally do.

He asked me to start emailing him my times for my runs during the week. Um... someone has been totally slacking, so hopefully that will be the kick in the butt I need to get my training in gear. Shame on me for not being good at training this season.

I just noticed my title, so I suppose I should comment about the alligator I saw at the turn around point. It was approximately three feet long, a little gator. Still, I get so excited seeing wild life!

It should be noted, last week's six miles took me 1:31. This week's six miles took me 1:27 (because I'm counting when the 6 miles ended, not when I turned off my iPod). So I improved my time. Hooray for that!

I'd also like to mention the gorgeous sunrise this morning. It's such a pretty area to run.

finally feeling good-ish

2009-09-26T19:00:00.003-04:00

This morning's run was in Celebration. It was a beautiful course, but no bathroom, which meant my bladder screamed my entire run. Stupid bladder. The route started at the movie theater and wound around several bodies of water, over several boardwalks, through conservation areas, and past million dollar homes. An absolutely gorgeous run. It would have been even better if it were less hot, but whatcha gonna do in Orlando? Two loops equalled six miles.

I ran the first mile without walking, which was approximately fourteen minutes. Then, my running buddy Laura kept running while I walked with her. Yes, like my cousin, she is good at the slow and steady run that I suck at. Laura is awesome and did her four required miles without walking. She rawks! It took us 47 minutes to do the first three miles. You know I always shoot for the elusive 38 minute 5K, so I was a little disappointed in my time and decided I needed to step it up for the second loop. This meant ye olde standby run/walk ratio.

I started my second loop with a run 2 walk 1 ratio but was only able to keep that ratio for maybe a mile before I settled into a 1:1 ratio. My second three took me about 43 minutes, so I did shave four minutes off, and gave me a negative split, which is awesome! But I wish I had been a bit quicker.

Let's talk about my coach. I love my coach. I love my coaches from last year, too, but I get way more one-on-one time with this coach. He only has a total of nine people to coach whereas my other coaches have something like thirty people to coach, so it makes sense that he would have more time to devote to each of us individually. It's nice to have him running beside me, encouraging me, and offering me advice on breathing and posture and pace. It makes having to drive so much farther to train worth it because I am getting so much more out of my training this year than I did last year.

I've been pretty pain-free during my runs, which is fantastic. But in the car on the drive home this morning, my left foot seized up something fierce. I stopped at a store, and cried out in pain when I tried to stand on my left foot. I walked the pain off. I think it has to do with my shoe laces. I need to get new shoes sooner rather than later; I'm pretty sure that will help solve some of my foot pain. Tonight, twelve hours after my run, my left foot hurts again. I have it elevated and have been massaging it. It'll get better.

I'm pretty pleased with the run from this morning.

Oh! In my last mile or so, as I ran across a boardwalk, a giant owl flew across the boardwalk not two feet directly in front of my face. It was awesome! I called out to two bicyclists who were standing a few feet ahead to see the owl. They then pointed out a young two-point buck standing down in the conservation area staring up at us. And me without my camera! It was so awesome! I couldn't stop for long, though, as I was racing my clock and didn't want to break stride.

Best part of my run this morning, aside from the wildlife sightings, was at the start of my second loop. I was on a boardwalk, and it was during my two minutes of run time. There were two older ladies walking a dog on the right side, and three bicyclists approaching from the other direction on the left side. The bicyclists very kindly yielded to me, and I thanked them as I ran past the two ladies, and past the bicyclists. One of the older ladies said, "oh, there's a runner coming through."

A runner.

She called me a runner!

Because that's what I am. Funny how something so trivial can ameliorate my mood!

monday night, ankle be damned

2009-09-21T20:38:00.003-04:00

Monday nights always start out with crazy ab exercises.

My ankles are both still hurting from Saturday's hill run. And I didn't sleep last night. So tonight's run was a bit rough for me. In fact, I just didn't have enough get up and go inside me to do as well as I would have liked to.

We kept up a pretty decent run/walk ratio of like run 8 walk 1.5 or something like that. But I just didn't have it in me tonight.

Tackling "Big Bertha"

2009-09-19T15:43:00.006-04:00

This morning the Orange/Seminole and Osceola teams met up out in Lake county to tackle a hill we call Big Bertha. Now, last year, I always skipped the Bertha runs because I was unemployed, gas was nearing $4 a gallon, and I couldn't afford to drive that far. So this was a, um, treat? for me.

The run starts in the parking lot for the Target in Clermont. I've been to the plaza many times, and should know how to get there since we have family that lives in Clermont. But, apparently in the dark, I get lost even more easily. I somehow completely missed the Clermont exit off the Turnpike, and didn't realize it until I exited at the next exit (way far away) and found myself on Route 27 outside the Lakeridge Winery. Leave it to me to find wine when I needed to find the run! When I finally found the meeting place, I had missed group stretching, and the team was just beginning their run.

Laura and I jogged out of the parking lot and immediately encountered an enormous hill. Surely that must be Bertha. Alas, a mile later, we encountered the real Bertha, and Bertha was intimidating. How the heck did that mountain sneak into flat central Florida?!

This might be on my third trip up Bertha:

I had to do three trips up and down Bertha. I walked up. The second time up, we were instructed to walk up it backward. Let me tell you how farookin difficult that was! Holy Toledo! I had no idea something could be so daunting! Remember that bridge I ran in Panama City? Yeah, that's like a speed bump compared to Bertha.

Here's four of the six Team Osceola members who climbed Bertha this morning walking backwards up the mountain:

The guy in purple is my Coach. The girl is "Laura". I'm back there, and the other guy had the misfortune of calling me this morning because he was lost, only to discover I was lost!

Anyway, Bertha was conquered and we only have to do her one more time this season. Brutal, beastly Bertha.

Back to the waterfront

2009-09-14T20:54:00.003-04:00

Vacation is over. And I'm glad. It's so much easier to train when you have people keeping you accountable. You know, not that my cousin and CIL didn't try to keep me accountable while I was up there for eight or nine days, but training with my team is different.

It began with the torturous crunches that get easier and easier the more I do them. Imagine that! Then, Coach wanted us to do a fifteen minute run. My coach ran with me and another girl (let's give her a name... Laura) the entire time. He kept me at a slower pace, and we ran seventeen minutes without stopping and without walking, which added up to 1.23 miles. Then, we took a bit of a breather as we walked over to another part of the park.

Coach had drawn two lines on the pavement, approximately 150 meters (?) apart. He had us do fartleks. This was my first time doing fartleks, and I'm not sure I'll ever be a fan, but I understand the value of them. Laura, Coach, and I would run a slow pace from line to line, then turn for a faster pace back, and slow again, and fast again, and slow. Then, Coach let us walk for a minute or two before starting the second set. Walk some more, and a final set of fartleks.

They were so hard. I was okay for the first two sets, but that third set, OMG, I thought I'd die. Thank goodness Coach and Laura were there to offer me encouragement, or I promise I would have quit. It was hard.

I am so proud of myself and of Laura. We totally rocked our training tonight. The other team mates that were there tonight are much more in the "runner" category than I am. Must not compare myself to others.

I left training feeling very positive. Oh, and I talked to Coach before training began (I got there half an hour early and planned to get in 2 miles to make up for being short on miles last week, but Coach was also there, and so we talked) about my leg issues of last week. I'm thrilled to tell you that my left leg had no issues tonight. Yay!

I'm still not sure I really want to do the full marathon, but I have a month before I have to recommit and make that decision. If Coach keeps riding my ass like he's doing, I'll really have no excuses to not do the full marathon.

in need of a positive run

2009-09-10T21:04:00.002-04:00

After two incredibly crappy runs, I desperately needed a good run. Tonight was the bridge run. I was very apprehensive, given recent left leg/right ankle issues. I bandaged my right ankle and crossed my fingers. It was a very good run, and I am mostly pleased overall.

I walked the uphills and ran the downhills. My average pace wasn't spectacular, but since my left leg really didn't complain at all, and my bandaged right ankle didn't force me to stop, I'm pretty pleased.

I felt great throughout, and great at the end. That is a spectacular feat in and of itself.

Now for the complaint. I ran with a local running group (I'm out of town, and thus not with my people). These people are amazing runners, as was demonstrated by how many times they each lapped me. But, I work very hard at not comparing myself to others. For every single person that passed me by, I offered positive reinforcement; I am nothing if not a great cheerleader during runs. Almost none of them offered me positive reinforcement in return.

Kids, I give what I require in return. So when I'm huffing and puffing and loudly proclaiming things like, "WAY TO GO! KEEP IT UP! GO GIRL! YOU'RE AWESOME! GREAT JOB!" it's not just because I want to encourage you. I require positive reinforcement. Running is ridiculously difficult. It seems to me, if you're doing something hard and you see someone else working hard too, you should occasionally cheer them on. When I run at home, without fail, when I am passed by other runners, they always cheer me on. Even when I'm not training with my team. These people here were wholly unsupportive as I ran. And that sucked.

But, regardless of the almost complete lack of positive reinforcement (after the third time of me cheering some on, they did reciprocate), I think I had a great run. Not my best run, but pretty fucking great.

It doesn't look steep, but I promise it is!

nearing the top

thumbs up for a great run!

the other side

I did one full lap, then went almost to the end of the bridge (I knew if I got off the bridge, I'd quit prematurely), then went back to the top and back down, for a lap and a half. I then did repeats until I hit my goal of one hour, which worked out to four miles.

in which I give up and call for help

2009-09-08T12:11:00.004-04:00

I'm on vacation. I have to train. Saturday night, I participated in a midnight 5K race. It was awful. I seem to have/be developing an injury in my left leg. During my race, my left leg started screaming 6 minutes into it, and screamed the rest of the race. It sucked.

With much apprehension, I strapped on my shoes this morning and hit the road. It's a mile up the road to a nice shopping plaza. I planned to go there, run around the plaza, and come home. I was shooting for three miles, which should have taken me about 45 minutes.

This morning, I felt pretty okay for the first mile. But boy, once my leg started screaming after that first mile, it screamed loud and long. And so I walked. Slowly. Very slowly. And limped. And... called my husband to have him get out of bed and come retrieve me.

Crappy ass run.

We came back to the condo we're staying at on the beach and changed into swimwear. We then walked that mile back up to the same intersection I had run to, only on sand. It worked my leg muscles differently than walking on hard surfaces does. And, my left leg continues to hurt. Only now my right ankle, my weaker ankle, the one I had issues with all last year, started hollering too.

My fucking body is betraying me, and it's only September.

TNT first Monday night training

2009-08-31T22:18:00.003-04:00

I went to training with my Osceola team tonight. We started with pain-inducing ab exercises. OMG! Killer crunches. And I can generally crunch without problem. Good god, my coach is an evil, sadistic man! I would have much rather run an extra mile than do some of those exercises!

We all ran together at a really slow pace. And... for the first time ever... I ran a full mile without walking! Now, to be completely honest, I did have a 15 second stop when my shoe had to be re-tied, but other than that, I ran a full mile without walking! GO ME! Of course, that made me flat out exhausted and not much good for the second mile, but my overall pace wasn't too terrible. We only did two miles and thirty minutes due to weather. We run in rain, but not in lightening.

2009: first TNT training

2009-08-30T19:04:00.002-04:00

Saturday was the first training with my Osceola Team in Training team. I'm the mentor for the Osceola team, even though I'm not an Osceola resident. The Osceola team only has 10 people on it, whereas the Orlando (Orange/Seminole) team has dozens and dozens of people, probably 50 or so.

We met up in Buenaventura Lakes, which was only about 15 miles from my house, which was actually closer than where the Orlando team trained (Altamonte Springs). Coach talked to us and taught us some stretches, then had us run two laps around the park. Each lap was half a mile. I picked up the rear of the pack with two girls of similar stature to me. I had spoken and or emailed with both of them, and anticipated them having some confidence issues with running, as I had last year and continue to have when I forget to not compare myself to others. I think they were trying to prove themselves, even though I talked to them about running ratios and the importance of not comparing themselves to, say, the girl in the coordinated running outfit who's been running her entire life. We ended up running the entire first lap without walking! That's half a mile. I was pretty proud of myself, too!

For the second lap, I kept us on a walk two run one ratio. I could tell they were tired. I was feeling the heat. Good lord it's hot out there in summer! I cannot run in that heat. As much as I hate early mornings, I hope our training sessions start earlier soon.

After the second lap, Coach had us all stop, hydrate, and he talked to us about form.

For the third and fourth laps, Coach ran with us, keeping pace with each of us individually to talk to us about form and to see how we were doing. Truth is, he may have had more to say to other people than he did to me. That's not to say I don't need the help, but I'm a repeat marathoner, and I suspect he spent more time talking with the first timers.

Anyway, for the third and forth laps, I think I did a 1:1 ratio. I was ahead of the two girls I ran with earlier, but we ended up pretty much keeping the same pace.

Overall, it ended up being a very good pace for me and a very consistent run.

I'm excited to not get up at the crack of dawn tomorrow to run. Instead, I'll be joining the Orlando team for their Monday night training. They literally train 2 blocks from my place of employment, whereas the Osceola team trains a good hour away from my place of employment. Seems like a no brainer to me!

friday 5a

2009-08-28T09:42:00.002-04:00

I was pleasantly surprised to see some of my neighbors up and walking the 'hood this morning. That will make it so much less scary for me to be up so farookin early in the morning, running in the dark.

For the first ten minutes, I did my 1:2 ratio, settled into a 1:1 ratio, and pulled out an additional 2 minutes of running at minute 26. Only had to do 30 minutes this morning. That's about two miles.

Tomorrow is the first team training. An easy 3 miles. Looking forward to meeting the rest of my team.

630p: slightly cooler, but still too hot

2009-08-25T19:08:00.003-04:00

Dear Self:
Why don't you get out of bed in the morning, when you prefer to run? You'll adjust to getting up a little earlier. And it'll be so worth it to not have to run in the evening, when it's too bloody hot and all your neighbors are out staring at your fat ass as you pretend to be a runner.

K thx bai.

Recap by minute:
0-1: walk
1-3: run
3-4: walk
4-6: run
6-7: walk
7-9: run

Then, my 1:2 morphed into a steady 1:1 ratio, until minute 22, when I ran for 30 seconds and followed it up with 90 seconds of walking before settling back into a roughly 1:1 ratio again.

I stayed inside my neighborhood because the sky was ominous; I didn't want to be far from home in case of lightening. Lightening is not my friend. The storm front gave a merciful breeze, but it was still too hot.

I'm pretty pleased that my overall pace today was 14'38" since yesterday's was 15'24". I like to see dramatic improvement! I'll like it even more when my overall pace is in the 13' category.

hey dumbass: when you haven't run in a month and a half, running in the heat of the day is idiotic

2009-08-24T19:36:00.004-04:00

Granted, I have not run since July 6th, but I have been walking in the evenings for much of July and some of August. Now, it's time for marathon training to kick into gear again. And so, I run.

Since I have to be to work at 7a, it's really hard for me to get up early and get my morning run in. Hopefully, since I ran in the heat of the day today, that'll motivate me to get up in the morning. It was too farookin hot to be running this afternoon. And it won't be much cooler in the evening.

I was only required to do thirty minutes today. Obviously, that's all I did. I might have done a full route around the lake had it not been August in Florida. God it was hot.

Details in minutes:
0-1: walk
1-3: run
3-4: walk
4-6: run
6-7: walk
7-9: run

Then, my 1:2 ratio completely fell apart. Compounding my problem: since I only had to do thirty minutes, I ran without water. Moron. Never again. I require water.

getting back to it

2009-07-06T12:45:00.003-04:00

I only put in two miles this morning. It was bloody hot, even at 8a.

In other news, Nike has made changes to their site. I like some of them (the ways my runs are now displayed, and the ease with which I can now categorize them), but some of the changes suck (I can't embed my run on here that I can tell, and my widget has issues). Oh well.

I only ran for half an hour this morning. That amounted to two miles. For the first mile, I kept up a 1:1 ratio. But for the second mile, it was impossible. It was just too hot.

But at least I got back to it. It all starts with one step.

in which I lose the argument and wonder who I can call to come retrieve me

2009-05-13T08:15:00.003-04:00

Some runs are good, some are miserable. And then some are pain, with no way to sugar coat it. My goal this morning was five miles. Easy peasy, right? Wrong. I had not even entered my second minute (and I always walk the first two minutes) when my left leg started hollering at me. This conversation took place over the course of a mile:

Left Leg: ow.
Brain: suck it up.
LL: Ow.
B: Running through the pain. Shut up.
LL: OW.
B: I'm not listening.
LL: OW!
B: All right. Bastard.

Only by that time my left leg was so insistent that we stop running, it was also pissy about walking, and I started to think maybe I should call my MIL to come pick me up. Alas, it would have been a bigger pain to try to give her directions to come find me than it would have been to walk home 1.2 miles. One mile is nothing.

My left leg said: OW OW OW OW OW!

Sigh.

Needless to say, this completely ruined my overall pace, as I found myself unable to run, let alone attempt to do a fast walk.

I'm really disappointed. I truly wanted to get in five miles this morning. It was kind of cool, in as much as it can be cool on a day that will reach 90 degrees, because it rained all night long, and that made for a slightly cooler morning. Stupid leg.

I've not had this particular kind of pain before, so I'm not sure what to expect with it. I've been running through my right ankle pain for months and months and months. But this left leg pain, well, I don't know what to make of it. I'll try again on Friday, I guess, to get out there.

I'm way behind on my goal of 40 miles in 4 weeks, and was hoping to make up ground this morning. Alas, I am only at 11.8 miles, and today is day 8 of that goal. So I guess I'm about on target, but I wanted to be ahead of target. Dammit.

hot as hell

2009-05-12T08:14:00.004-04:00

OMG, it is getting hotter and hotter and hotter, no matter how early I go running in the morning. Clearly I am not meant to be running in the summer months. I knew today would be a short run because I have places to go and people to see this morning. I'm pleased to say, despite the heat, this was a relatively easy two miles. It would have been easier if it had not been so bloody hot all ready. Gah!

I could have gone another mile in the amount of time I had, but it was really hot. I cannot do much in this kind of heat.

rough time of it

2009-05-07T09:25:00.003-04:00

I cannot even tell you how much I did not want to run this morning. Oh, sure, my mind was in it, but my body was a less-than-willing participant. Nevertheless, I dragged my tired butt out there and forced myself to move.

I added a very little distance on to my route. I think I mentioned all ready that I'm trying to add a little at a time to see what each addition is, mileage wise. I'm a little surprised my addition only added about 1.8 onto the route. It felt more like .3! My mind was telling me it wanted to reach five miles today, but it just was not meant to be. Anyway, it's not how far or how fast I went, it's that I went at all that matters.

Now then, about the run. Walked two, ran two, and then settled into a 1:1 for the rest of the run. I was feeling flat out exhausted and it took a lot of mental work to get through the route around the lake.

It's safe to say there was absolutely nothing I enjoyed about this run. It sucked. And it was bloody hot out there, even though I started at 740a. I was pouring sweat. Gah, I hate Florida.

Go me, though, for getting out there when I flat out did not want to go. It might have actually gone better if I had eaten more than a handful of pretzels before I left, but that would have just made it later (hotter) in the day, and I would have been less inclined to get out there and pound out a few miles.

I set a goal for myself on the Nike+ site earlier this week: run 40 miles in 4 weeks. That should be a simple goal to knock out, and I imagine, if I can stay motivated, that I can bang it out in three weeks instead of four. I'm all ready at 7.3 miles, and only three days into the goal. Time will tell! I also signed up for a challenge on the Nike+ community: to run a 45' 5K by July 12th. Well, I beat that today. But in order to win the challenge, I have to beat out the other participants. I don't see that happening; this morning, I'm in 11th place in the challenge. No doubt there are only eleven challengers! Wow! Actually, there are 33 people signed up for this challenge, so far!

Product Review: Clif Builder's Bars

2009-05-05T12:46:00.004-04:00

During my marathon training, I posted some product reviews of various types of fuel over on my main blog. My reviews included Power Bar Gels and Luna Gels and Sports Beans and PowerBar Gels (two flavors). I think I also wrote about sports drinks, but I'm not going to search for those links (I like G2 or Powerade).

Anyway, I tried another product today that I love: Clif Builder's Bar, Peanut Butter flavor.

The bar appears to be small*, but actually takes several bites and several minutes to consume. It tastes almost like a candy bar. Hooray! It's chocolate covered and is granola-like consistency inside. It's delicious. Not something I'd crave if I were craving, say, a Peanut Butter Twix or something similar, but wonderful for a pre-run snack. Wash it down with a little water or G2, and you're good to go.

Good, crispy consistency. Great taste. A great bar. I highly recommend it.

*upon reviewing the Clif site, I think the bars I have are sample size, as the calorie count on the bar I consumed this morning is half of what is listed for that flavor on their site. This would make sense because I received these as samples at the expo before my marathon.

just a quick stress relieving run

2009-05-05T10:12:00.002-04:00

I was very angry and upset this morning. Instead of comforting myself with food, I laced up and pounded out a couple miles. This is tremendous progress for me, because wouldn't comfort food have been so much easier and tastier? I'm proud of myself for running out my aggression instead of eating.

I was planning to run a short run anyway, but I had to take care of some financial stuff first, which took far too long (and lead to my rage), and made it too late in the day to want to go run. If you're unfamiliar with Orlando in May, it is bloody hot out there. Even at 9am. Too hot for running. But, I went out at around 850a. Because of the heat, however, I only did a short run.

Details then: walked 2, ran 3, walked 1, ran 3, and then settled into a 1:1 ratio. I kept a consistent pace, as you can see, until my cell phone rang. It was an important call, and I had stepped wrong on my left ankle, so I was happy to walk for several minutes for the phone call and ankle hiatus.

All in all, I'm pleased with today's run. In the miserable heat.

surprising

2009-05-04T09:02:00.006-04:00

(Disclaimer: the graph Nike+ is showing me on their site looks nothing at all like the graph it puts over here when I grab the code. This graph is completely inconsistent. The other is very straight. I wonder which I should believe?)

I am rather shocked at how consistent this morning's run ended up being:

It certainly didn't feel that consistent. My first two minutes, of course, were walked. Then, I ran three, walked one, ran three, walked one, before settling into a run two walk one pace for two miles. Of course I was aiming for that elusive 38 minute 5K and, of course, didn't come close to it. One of these days I will surprise myself, I will! As mile 3 approached, though (and my time reflects this), I struggled to maintain even a one to one ratio. It was beastly hot already, at only 830a. Ugh, it's miserable in Florida in the summer (and it's not even summer!).

I went a slightly different route to see if it made a mileage difference, and it did. It added not quite .2 mile onto the route. I wanted to add additional mileage onto it, but am curious to see what each addition actually adds, so I'll be adding one addition per run. I need to get this loop back up to five miles, especially if I'm planning to re-join TNT in August to train for the Disney marathon again, which I am planning to do.

I may have to start researching shoes. The bottoms of my feet have been hurting. It could just be a lacing issue, though, so I'll play around with that. Also, it could just be my body complaining because it would rather go back to bed in the mornings!

with great sloth comes crappy runs

2009-04-29T09:57:00.006-04:00

I don't know why I expect the runs to get easier if I refuse to run regularly. Here's this morning's run details:

Distance: 4.4mi
Duration: 1:03'25"
Pace: 14'24"/mi
Calories: 729

I have completed 70 workouts for a total of 383.69mi. My average pace is 14'30" per mi.

So, let's talk about how inconsistent this run was. Overall, I think it was pretty good, because I pushed myself really hard during the first mile and leading into the third mile. As usual, I walked the first two minutes. Then, I ran five minutes. Five. That's a lot for me. I was debating with myself about whether or not I should push myself to run a full mile yet or not. In the end, I decided not to because I wanted to the full loop around the lake, and if I ran a mile at the beginning, there was absolutely no way I'd be able to do the entire loop, and I would have to double back. I don't enjoy the first mile and a half of the route, so doubling back and covering that same ground is not appealing to me at all. So, it was walk 2, run 5, walk 2, run 4, walk 2, run 2. In between mile one and two, I kept it at a 2:2 ratio. I was already lamenting having blown my wad in the first mile.

Then, I became aware of the duration, and I decided to try to push hard to do my mythical 5K in 38 minutes goal that is apparently only achievable in races longer than 5K. At around 28 minutes, I made myself run for five minutes. It was killer, and I knew it wouldn't make a difference; that the 5K in 38 minutes was not going to be possible. But, mile 3 registered as a ridiculously fast (for me) 8'40". That's blazing fast for me. Mile one was also pretty quick at 12'27". But I think 8'40" is now my fastest mile... let me see if Nike+ tracks that data... yes, it does, and it still has me as a 10'26" as my fastest mile, so maybe I'm misinterpreting all this data. That wouldn't surprise me at all.

Anyway, because I blew my wad early in the run, the end of the run was brutal, and it was very difficult for me to even do a 2:2 ratio.

Best part of the run: after I crossed the bridge, which means I was about 1.8 miles from home, a real runner came zooming up from behind me. This was as I finished 2 minutes of running and was beginning 2 minutes of walking. You could tell he was a real runner just by looking at him. And as he passed me by, he said, "Great job! Keep it up!" I needed encouragement so badly at that exact moment, and there he was, offering it to me! The running community is so wonderful. Then, .3 miles later, another runner approached (running the opposite direction). And as he passed me by, he said, "Good work! Keep going!" Verily, I needed his encouragement, too.

Yes, yes, I reciprocated praise to both of them. I'm nothing if not a great cheerleader for others. I'm just not so great at cheering myself on.

It was also a bit too warm to be running, at the late, late hour of 745a. But, I had to wait for my stomach to be sad before I could leave my house. I knew it was destined to be upset this morning and prefer it to be angry before I run. I was glad, however, that I remembered to wear my sunglasses.

There's a 5K coming up in a week or so. I really wanted to sign up for it, but... still unemployed. That'd be a totally frivolous waste of $19. This being unemployed nonsense is really screwing with my motivation to run.

after 4 weeks of excuses, I hit the pavement this morning

2009-04-20T06:11:00.002-04:00

I told myself it was a two lap minimum, which can be stretched to two miles. I think two miles is the minimum I should allow myself to complete. But, getting up at 510a and running in the dark means I don't leave the neighborhood, for safety. My run was really slow, but that's okay; I have not run in four weeks.
Here the run:

I actually had a good strategy. I always walk the first two minutes to warm up. Then, I ran three walked one for the first lap. During the second lap, I sometimes walked two, and sometimes ran two. I took many peoples' advice and slowed my run down. I can jog an 11 minute mile, but I kept it at a 13 minute mile today. I was looking for duration, not speed. I have not set my ratio at a 3:1 before. I'd like to get my ratio higher than that before the fall. And, my current goal is to be able to run more than a mile without having to walk. I'm pretty sure I could do that right now, but I have not pushed myself beyond .6 of running. So, I think my real goal is to run two miles without having to walk. That seems like a good goal.

what an inconsistent run that was

2009-03-20T10:27:00.003-04:00

Ugh. I tried so hard this morning, but I could not keep up a decent walking pace. I did really good maintaining a one to one ratio (walk one minute, run one minute). There was only one point where I was too lost in my thoughts to realize it was time to run, and that made a two minute walk, but that only happened once. The problem today was my walking pace; I could not get faster than a 17 minute mile. And, it killed my overall pace.

Distance: 4.83mi
Duration: 1:09'06"
Pace: 14'17"/mi
Calories: 801

Now, look at this run:

Holy crap! While I thought I was doing a really consistent run, in that I kept my 1:1 ratio, it turns out my run was all over the place. Super suck.

I can take comfort, I guess, in knowing I at least got out there, and I feel pretty good after the run.

But, the truth is, I'm really bummed now that I can see just how inconsistent this run was. I'm better than that. Or I was. Shame on me for not being at the same level I was at just two short months ago. Hey dumbass: get out there more than once a week!

I have completed 68 workouts for a total of 377.27mi. My average pace is 14'30" per mi.

Sunday Sunday Sunday!

2009-03-15T09:26:00.006-04:00

Militaryman invited me to join in for a run this morning. He took pity on me after making me try to run too late in the day last week and proposed an 8a start time. Eight is so much better than ten. I was determined to do better than last week, which was a pathetically slow run.

Distance: 4.80 mi
Duration: 1:10'36"
Pace: 14'40" min/mi
Calories: 797

How could that only be 4.8 miles? Gah! Re-calibrating my iPod has made my former five mile route short. Dammit.

I tried to keep us on a run 1 walk 2 ratio. How the hell did I do a marathon in January? Good gravy I'm hot and tired! And it wasn't even five miles!

Militaryman said he ran the entire route without having to walk. Must not compare myself to others. He's a military man; of course he's able to run more than me. I'm just pleased to have company on my run, and having someone who forces me to get my lazy ass back out there.

Updated to add:

good gravy, it's hot out there

2009-03-07T11:54:00.005-05:00

My neighbor asked if I wanted to go for a run this morning at around 10a. In my world, 10a is far too late in the day to begin a run, but I'm anxious to have a running buddy, especially when running at home, where I have that creepy guy on my radar. Militaryman wanted to know the route I run, since the route around the lake is not obvious until you've gone on that route. I warned him in advance that I was slow, but I was slower than normal trying to run in the heat.

Yes, yes, I realize 10a today is still cooler than any time of the day in July or August, but I am a Northern girl, and I feel the heat. Around mile 1.5, NeighborBoy looked at me and commented about how red my face is. That's because it's hot!

Enough making excuses for my ridiculously slow "run," here's the details:

Distance: 4.14 mi
Duration: 1:05'44"
Pace: 15'50" /mi
Calories: 687

Ugh. What a slow pace. That kills my overall average.

Still, getting out and moving my body for an hour is much better than sitting my happy ass down on the couch and watching inane television. Also, I promised a friend I would do a 5K today to support her as she completes a 5K to help fight colon cancer in her town. Mission accomplished.

I have completed 66 workouts for a total of 367.62 miles. My average pace is 14'30" per mile.

one mile at a time

2009-03-04T11:33:00.004-05:00

I re-calibrated my Nike+iPod doohickey this morning. I walked for .3 and then ran for .3. Frankly, I was worried about running for .3 because while that doesn't sound like a long distance, it kind of is. But, a couple weeks ago, I ran .6 without walking, so I knew I could do it. Anyway, my iPod is now re-calibrated. And, of course, that .6 did not count in my run this morning.

To be fair, though, I didn't really go very far. I was disinclined to leave my neighborhood, and only did one lap. I haven't downloaded it yet, but here are the details of this run.

Distance: 1.00 mi
Duration: 15'00"
Pace: 14'55" min/mi
Calories: 166

I also lowered my weight by 10 pounds on my iPod, because I am at least 10 pounds lighter than I was whenever I entered that weight. I'm sure weight plays a role in however the iPod figures calories burned.

Like I said, it was a very short run, only a total of 1.6 miles when you add in the calibration.

So, let's analyze my problem, I've had an unusual rash type skin affliction in a very personal area. For a week and a half I have been applying a salve trying to heal this affliction. The problem: my underwear rubs directly on the area. I keep trying different styles of underwear hoping it will avoid aggravating the area, but nothing has worked yet. Husband has suggested I go commando. I will likely do that once it is no longer tuesday.

Anyway, I don't generally chafe while running, but with this very personal, irritating affliction, I chafed and chafed and chafed on this run. So, a mile of chafing was all I was willing to commit to. Because I promise you, this skin irritation hurts like crazy, and trying to run was so not fun for that particular area of my body.

Thus the short run. Pity, too, because it's gorgeous weather for a run.

I'm off to shower, and apply more salve to my poor afflicted skin.

Updated to add the graph:

post marathon blues

2009-02-27T10:25:00.003-05:00

So, I did my marathon on January 11th. I followed that up with a solid month of sloth. Then, last Tuesday, I did a quick, roughly five mile run. Then, a week of sloth with lots of yard work mixed in. And now, this morning, I finally got my lazy ass out there for a run.

I need a running buddy or an accountability person, because I'm not doing very well at self-motivation.

And I do love running, you know, except that I hate it. Until I find gainful employment, I can't register for the races I want to do. And, really, races are the best motivation to keep running.

At least I got back out there this morning. And two of those miles were surprisingly fast! Yay for that. But I could totally tell I haven't been as active; my body is sluggish and loathe to move.

Wondering if I need to buy new shoes

2008-11-26T15:41:00.003-05:00

They say you only get 400-500 miles out of a pair of running shoes. My coaches are telling us now is the time, six weeks before the marathon, to start breaking in a new pair if we're going to need new shoes. This has been weighing heavily on my mind, as I'm unemployed and running shoes are not cheap.

So, I logged into Nike+, since it tracks my miles for me. And, when you subtract out the miles I had accumulated before acquiring my new shoes on August 24th, I think I'm okay.

246.21 miles to date
40.88 miles before these shoes

205.33 miles on these shoes.

I'll be cutting it close, but I should be able to just eek by with these shoes.

I'll do 10 more miles this week.
And probably an average of 20 miles per week for the next five weeks.
That's about 110. And let's round up, it'll be more like 130 miles in five weeks. That'll have 335 miles on the shoes come marathon day.

I'll take my chances. My shoes still feel good, as they should with only 205 miles on them. Since shoes are not in the budget, it'll be okay.

seeking medical help

2008-09-17T08:01:00.000-04:00

I don't want to blog about this on my main blog because I am so down about this. Today the tears started. Self-pity, I guess.

I'm going to try to get an appointment today to see a sports doctor about my right leg. We need to rule out stress fracture. We need to come up with a treatment. Because I'm having a hard time walking, and that completely interferes with my marathon training.

embrace the suck

2008-08-27T05:58:00.003-04:00

Distance: 2.16 mi
Duration: 30′02″
Pace: 13′50″
Calories: 376

I have completed 19 workouts for a total of 43.15 miles. My average pace is 13'07" per mile.

Sigh. My pace slowed. Again.

On one hand, January cannot get here soon enough. On the other, good grief but I'm in over my head. A marathon? WTF was I thinking?

first official run, training for my marathon

2008-08-19T08:55:00.004-04:00

Distance: 4.5 mi
Duration: 1:01′42″
Pace: 13′41″
Calories: 782

I have completed 18 workouts for a total of 40.98 miles. My average pace is 13'05" per mile.

This run was completed early in the morning while the bands of Tropical Storm Fay started to pelt Orlando. I got soaked for approximately two of those miles. I didn't mind the rain, as it was refreshing, but the water got into my right eye and really affected my ability to see. It really hated my contact lens in that eye. Also, my clothing was so much heavier dripping water.

But, it made for a cool, refreshing run.

please join my team

2008-08-11T08:33:00.007-04:00

Okay kids, here's the deal. I told you that I have signed up to be on the Team In Training team for the Disney Marathon coming up in January. They will train me and cover my expenses but I have to raise money for a very worthy cause: to help fight blood born cancers.

By helping to raise funds for leukemia, lymphoma and myeloma research and patient services, you'll receive:

* Personalized fitness training by certified coaches for a period of four to five months
* Training clinics
* Your own personal Web site for online fundraising
* A supportive group of teammates
* Lodging and airfare to more than 60 accredited events in the United States and abroad.

I have to tell you, I am very, very apprehensive about doing fund raising. It is not something I have ever been good at, mostly because asking people for money is so far out of my comfort zone. But leukemia, lymphoma and myeloma research and patient services is a very worthy cause. I have been blessed to not know anyone personally who has been affected by these horrible diseases, but I want to help anyway.

So here's the deal. I have been asked to raise $2,400 by the end of December. That number is quite intimidating! But with your help, I can do it! I figure I have probably fifty regular readers. If each of you fifty could commit to just $10 a month for the next five months (August through December), that would put me over my goal, $2,500. Ten bucks a month is pretty easy to fit into a budget, isn't it? It's taking your lunch twice that month instead of eating fast food. It's skipping two mocha latte's from evil coffee conglomerate. Super easy. And for such a good cause.

Please, talk it over with your significant other, and please consider pledging just $10 a month for the next five months to help fund cancer research and help me train to run the marathon in honor of a person currently fighting cancer (I think I meet my person in two weeks). You and I can make a difference!

What happens to the money I raise?

Good question. Team In Training figures my expenses will run around $600. They multiply that by four to get the $2,400 figure I have been asked to raise. So, for every dollar I raise, twenty-five cents goes toward my expenses. My expenses include training, a team tee-shirt, two or three nights in a hotel the weekend of the marathon, a high-carb pasta party the night before the marathon, and a post-run party. (I think that's everything.) I'll be upfront with you about what I'm involved in because I want you to believe in me, believe in this cause, and believe we can make a difference by raising funds to help fund cancer research.

If I do not raise the full funds by the end of December, I have the option of not running (NOT AN OPTION!) or funding the rest out of pocket. If I fund the balance, I then have two additional months to continue fund raising to reimburse myself. No matter what, the money goes to The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.

With your help, I can meet my goal!

One more thing, if you are interested in joining a team to run a marathon, either here or in your area, please mention you heard it from me as that will knock a little bit of money off the total I have to raise. And if your company would like to be a corporate sponsor, I can find out more about how to do that. Your company's logo will go onto our marketing materials, and the back of our purple shirts as our team runs the marathon in January. Since it's a charity, talk to your tax adviser about tax benefits of donating to charity.

UPDATED:
Rachel Lucas had a great suggestion. For easier payment options, you can either hit my Amazon tip jar or my Paypal button to save having to enter in your credit card information. I will redirect all funds to my Team In Training account.

in training

2008-08-09T13:55:00.003-04:00

I have joined Team in Training. I am training to run the Disney Marathon in January. Please consider making a donation to help fight Leukemia, Lymphoma, and other blood-born cancers, and to help me train for this marathon. I have a Team in Training website that I am currently tweaking. My website is here. I need to raise $2,400 by the end of December. I can do this, with your help.

Thank you for your emotional and financial support. :)

Team In Training

2008-07-31T21:37:00.004-04:00

I have signed up to attend an informational meeting about Team In Training next weekend.

From the email I received this evening:

Experienced coaches design a day-by-day training program which prepares participants for their race day events. Participants are training for optimal performance and receive sound advice on form, technique, race strategies, equipment, injury prevention and nutrition. At the same time, participants benefit from improved strength, cardiovascular
endurance and weight management. Group training consists of weekend morning workouts at various locations around the Central Florida area. There are also informal weekday group training sessions led by TNT mentors. Coaches send weekly emails that include training tips and updates.

And also this:

In return for all of these aspects of the program, participants are asked to raise funds for The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Once you achieve the participation minimum associated with your event, the TNT staff will arrange and pay for your airfare, hotel stay (double occupancy), race registration and TNT weekend events. The TNT staff is dedicated to helping you achieve your goal! Shortly after the Kick Off Celebration, the TNT staff will host a Fundraising Clinic to provide you with all the information you will need to reach your fundraising goal, including personal solicitation and letter writing campaigns, on-line fundraising, corporate sponsorship campaigns and organizing special events.

I'll go to the meeting and find out more then.

hey fatass, where'd your motivation go?

2008-07-17T09:31:00.001-04:00

I've been sick

2008-07-05T22:18:00.000-04:00

but I'm almost better now. I'd say Monday starts me back to "running."

improvement, no, really

2008-06-26T09:34:00.003-04:00

Ooh! I just noticed this. Let me put it side-by-side so I can better appreciate it.

Distance: 2.17 miles ----------2.11 miles
Time: 29'25" ------------------27'54"
Average: 13'31" per mile -----13'10" per mile

Okay, so on the left we have Tuesday morning and on the right we have Thursday morning. The distance is practically the same (I cut a corner this morning), but the time is different, and my average pace is ameliorating. Yay!

it's bound to get easier someday

2008-06-26T05:56:00.003-04:00

Distance: 2.11 miles
Time: 27'54"
Average: 13'10" per mile

I have completed 17 runs for a total of 36.47 miles. My average pace is 13'00" per mile.

For a change, my average pace stayed the same. That's a vast improvement over the recent slowing trend. So, Yay for that. I guess.

I started my route in reverse. On the one hand, it was smarter, because when I got to the circle I'm slightly afraid of, I ran almost the whole circle instead of just the first two-thirds of it, as the scary part is, in reverse, the final two-thirds instead of the first two-thirds. But, I just didn't have enough oomph to get all the way back to the corner.

Then I was faced with the long straight away. For some reason, in reverse, the long straight away seems insurmountable. So, I went back to the start of the scary circle, turned around, did another tour of the cul-du-sac (there are two cul-du-scas in my 'hood) and then ran the scary two-thirds of the circle again before getting back to my half of the neighborhood, where I had to make up distance since I drastically changed my route.

I might do the scary circle in reverse, but not the whole route. That long straight away is much less cumbersome heading away from home than toward home. I don't know why that is.

not sure what happened

2008-06-25T07:49:00.002-04:00

my cell phone alarm sounded at 505a, as I want it to. And then the real alarm clock sounded at 6a, as it has to for us to get to work on time. What happened in that hour? I certainly didn't get up and run. Lazy bum!

maybe my goal is unrealistic

2008-06-24T05:51:00.003-04:00

I gave my body a full week to get over the issues it complained about on my last run. A full week of sloth. Maybe my goal of that 13K in October is unrealistic.

Distance: 2.17 miles
Time: 29'25"
Average: 13'31" per mile

I have completed 16 runs for a total of 34.35 miles. My average pace is 13'00" per mile.
Oh look, I'm getting slower all the time.

How discouraging. Nike+ does a neat graph thing of my runs. And even though I know I ran more today than I typically do, you would never know it looking at my graph thing.

This sucks.

night off

2008-06-17T17:37:00.001-04:00

I'm going to take the night off. My leg hurts, and I don't want to push it. I'll be back on task tomorrow night.

what do you do when one of your legs says no?

2008-06-16T19:11:00.003-04:00

I stop. There is no point in possibly injuring myself. My left leg, the same leg that refused to climb steps over the weekend, said no. I tried to coax it into cooperating, but it said no.

Distance: 2.09 miles
Time: 28'33"
Average: 13'37" per mile

I have completed 15 runs for a total of 32.18 miles. My average pace is 12'57" per mile.

I'm disappointed. I needed to do three laps tonight.

despite the aches and pains

2008-06-15T19:38:00.003-04:00

I abused my body on Saturday. We're talking big time abuse. I'll post a picture for two reasons: so you can see why my arms, legs, and abs are screaming at me, and so I can post another picture of my disgusting body to help remind me that I need to run.

Yup, that's a fat blob on a slip-n-slide. All kinds of aches and pains come from that kind of fun. Oh the sacrifices I make for my kid.

Anyway, even though I was unable to climb stairs today due to my screaming left thigh, and even though my abs hate me, and even though my upper arms are asking to be amputated, I "ran."

Distance: 3.06 miles
Time: 42'20"
Average: 13'48" per mile

I have completed 14 runs for a total of 30.08 miles. My average pace is 12'55" per mile.

Yes, my average pace has decreased in the overall picture, but it will ameliorate. Just give me some time. I'm still in the beginning phase of training.

After my run, some random female's voice on my iPod said, "Hi this is Joyce somebodyorother. Congratulations! That was your longest run to date." And that's just another reason why I heart my Nike+iPod; it gives me random encouragement.

ugh tonight sucked

2008-06-12T21:10:00.004-04:00

Honestly. I have so little confidence in myself right now. It was a brutal run. And I'm feeling really discouraged, like setting the goal of that 13K in October is absolutely impossible. I know I'm probably just being totally unrealistic with my expectations of what I should be able to accomplish, but I'm discouraged and disgusted with myself.

That being said, I ran more tonight than I did last night. But when I walked, my pace was much slower than last night's walking pace. In fact, I had a really, really hard time keeping my pace above a 15 minute mile. Yet even as I tried to coax more oomph out of myself, I just couldn't do it. I'm tired.

Tomorrow, I get the night off. And probably Saturday night, too. But I'm back on for Sunday. Whether I like it or not. And maybe my body will be rested for Sunday's run.

Distance: 2.46 miles
Time: 33'02"
Average: 13'25" per mile

I have completed 13 runs for a total of 27.01 miles. My average pace is 12'49" per mile.

I just have to keep telling myself that I really want to do the 13K and that I can do it.

Meanwhile, the Nike+ website is really cool. Back on May 15th, I set a goal for myself on the site to run six miles in four weeks. I achieved that goal tonight! Go me! Hell, I achieved that goal this week, so clearly I should have set the goal higher. It gave me a gold medal for my efforts. I'm all about the imaginary gold medal!

I have it set up to help me train for the 13K. I'm currently 4 miles behind where the training says I should be. That does not help the belief in myself at all. Maybe I don't get tomorrow night off after all.

random encouragement!

2008-06-11T18:29:00.003-04:00

On my first lap of my pathetic attempt at a run tonight, a neighbor I have not yet met was in his convertible BMW waiting for his garage door to open as I walked in front of his vehicle. He said to me, "you're doing great! Keep up the good work!" I said, "thank you!" And it about made my night! Random encouragement is awesome!

I was out there much, much earlier than I like. It was still very much day light and ridiculously hot outside. As such, after my second lap of the neighborhood, I was just too wiped out to do a third lap. I hit two miles and called it done. I had to get out early, though, because tonight is poker night, and if I don't "run" before poker night, I won't run at all as it'll be far too late at night to go run. So, here it is:

Distance: 2.07 miles
Time: 27'21"
Average: 13'12" per mile

I have completed 12 runs for a total of 24.55 miles. My average pace is 12'45" per mile.

Considering I hardly ran at all tonight (combination of the bloody heat and my body being tired still from last night's "run"), I think that I kept a pretty respectable pace.

I'll take Fridays off. But that's the only real scheduling decision I have made so far about this. I am going to do no less than 2 miles per "run". And in two weeks, I'll hopefully be able to up that number.

I "ran" two nights in a row! Go me!

so there's this race coming up

2008-06-10T19:59:00.003-04:00

I want to run in the Tower of Terror 13K on October 25th. I am terribly out of shape, as we can all see anytime I post a picture. The most I have ever run is a 5K. That was in February. 2007. So, yeah, I have my work cut out for me. I figure I need to run almost every day if I plan to be ready to not place last in the 13K on October 25th. That's five months away. I can do it.

Tonight's run:

Distance: 2.86 miles
Time: 37'12"
Average: 12'58" per mile

I have completed 11 runs for a total of 22.48 miles. My average pace is 12'43" per mile.

It's a start. Go me! I'm totally going to be up for a 13K in five months! Please cheer me on, as I suffer from low self-esteem and motivation.

moving

2008-05-17T15:28:00.003-04:00

So, I also punched the punching bag 300 times with each fist the other night. And then my arms and shoulders hurt the next day, so that's good.

Meanwhile, today we visited both amusement parks at Universal today. Two hours, two parks, zero rides. But it was a good brisk walk. And, I'm tired.

I'd like to think I'm going to try to run tonight, but the theme parks were kinda harsh (wrong shoes).

pathetic, but at least it's something

2008-05-15T21:11:00.004-04:00

I broke out the Nike + iPod tonight. I'm amazed I could even find the two little pieces, given how long it's been since I used either. Anyway, I'm connected to the Nike+ website to upload my "run" information:

This is my 24'21" run
It was only 1.71 miles (two laps around my neighborhood)

I hardly ran at all since I am so ridiculously out of shape. Hello, did you see the picture (from February) that I posted yesterday? That's just not an angle I see myself from.

Since receiving my Nike+ on Christmas 2006, I have only completed 10 runs for a total of 10.61 miles. My average pace is 12'40" per mile.

hey fatso

2008-05-14T16:55:00.002-04:00

This is what you look like:

Are you happy with that?

DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

dumbells

2008-03-19T09:50:00.002-04:00

I was flat out exhausted yesterday, and busy all weekend. I gave myself a pass to not ride my bicycle last night. However, that meant I had to lift my little ten pound dumbells. I do twenty reps, except on that one lift that's unbelievably difficult, that only gets ten. And, I only do one set of three different lifts. Still, every little bit helps.

I need to get back into crunch mode. I seem to have bruised my tail bone. That kept me from wanting to lay on the floor and crunch last night. I'll start those back up soon.

And tonight, I must ride my bike. Non-negotiable.

inactivity

2008-03-17T19:52:00.004-04:00

ugh, I've been slothful.

Okay, on Saturday, we did walk and walk and walk at an outdoor art festival. And I took two additional trips back to the car.

I've been trying to drink four bottles of water per day. It's easier on work days than at home. I can suck down two bottles at work, one with dinner, and nurse the other until bedtime. But on weekends, well, it's just easier to share my husband's Coke.

Today I did not work, but I have sucked down two bottles of water and will likely get a third down by bedtime. Although I have a friend coming over to spend the night (we're super close to the airport, people frequently stay when they have an early flight). She's my wine friend. I expect we'll suck down one, if not two, bottles of wine. I'll need some water to cut down on the risk of hangover.

family ride

2008-03-12T21:48:00.003-04:00

My husband and kid joined me on the bike ride this evening. It was nice to have the company, but they really slowed me down. I'm not complaining. The five miles was sooo much easier at a slow, leisurely pace. We were out much longer, due to the slower pace, but that kind of means longer physical activity, right?

Anyway, five more miles tonight. Go me!

Popped in my new yoga DVD tonight. Watched the poses but didn't actually try any of them. I'm intimidated. I don't think I'm coordinated enough. Never underestimate my clumsiness.

two thirty-one

2008-03-11T19:19:00.003-04:00

I was at a home today that had a scale. A real scale. Like the kind in doctor's offices. When the coast was clear, I stepped onto the scale, somewhat apprehensive about what the number would be. Two hundred thirty-one pounds. I was actually afraid it would be higher than that. Last time I weighed myself months and months ago, I was in the mid two-twenties on an inaccurate scale. Two thirty-one is not as scary as I was expecting.

It's not acceptable, obviously, but I'm not plunged down into the pit of despair.

I neglected to mention, Sunday night I also punched the heavy bag two hundred times with each arm (four hundred punches total).

I just got home from riding my bike. The same route from Sunday night. It about killed me. First, my ass hurts from the bike seat. This will eventually stop aching as I continue to abuse my ass with the bike seat. But the ride itself was brutal.

I'll punch the bag later on.

I have a friend (I'm sure you're reading this) who is my accountability person. This person is trying to walk every day. Here's hoping we can keep each other motivated. It's so easy to find reasons not to exercise.

I need to take my body measurements like I did back when I lost all those inches (but not pounds) before my wedding. I'll try to do that tonight before I go to bed.

thirty-one years old

2008-03-09T20:36:00.003-04:00

I celebrated my thirty-first birthday over the weekend. I'm old, fat, and have gray hair.

I just rode my bike. I was going to do five laps around the neighborhood, but the speed bumps are brutal. Instead, I rode out of the neighborhood, up to the bridge over the lake. I think when I last clocked that drive, it's two and a half miles. If so, that was a brutal five mile ride.

Brutal.

About two thirds of the way to the bridge, I was ready to quit. But I kept telling myself to go just one more stop sign, and made it to the bridge.

Yes, that ride about killed me. I need to do this at least every other day.

Thirty-one years old. I will not be this enormous when I ring in number thirty-two. Unless I'm pregnant, that is.

sloth

2008-02-06T11:17:00.000-05:00

today is the first day I have pedaled at work this week. I did better last week. It all depends on what I need to accomplish and whether I have people bugging me, and clients coming in.

I discovered if I chew gum all day, I don't snack at all.

Did 30 regular crunches, 20 agonizing leg lifts, and 10 each of right and left crunches (at least I know what I mean!).

Have discovered being depressed all the time does not help me find any motivation to exercise. Cyclical: depressed about my appearance, too depressed to work out...

slow start

2008-01-31T14:18:00.000-05:00

Sunday night: 310 jumps on the jump rope. When I used to work out daily in 2003, I was able to go 500 without stopping (except when I tripped). This 300 nearly killed me, and I had to stop every 50 or so to gasp for air. I am so out of shape.

Yesterday: approximately fifteen minutes pedaling my little pedal gizmo.

I brought my pedal contraption to work so I can pedal while I sit at my desk. I'm pedaling right now, actually, and have five minutes so far for today. I figure even if it's only five minutes here or there throughout the day, and only adds up to twenty or thirty minutes, that's a hell of a lot better than just being sedentary all day long.

My only problem right now is figuring out the best way to manage pedaling at work. My chair has wheels, and it's hard to keep it from moving while I pedal. I'll have it figured out here shortly.

And, hey, if I pedal throughout the day at work, it's easier to justify not jumping or lifting weights at home. I still need to work out at home, but a little activity is so much better than none at all. Right?

here I come

2008-01-24T10:52:00.001-05:00

motivation: found

getting off to a slow start

2008-01-08T22:25:00.000-05:00

Funny how the best intentions go nowhere fast.

I have had such an urge to run, but life interferes at night and sleep has been evading me, so getting up early to run before work has been impossible. But, I had to do something. So I just punched my heavy bag roughly five hundred times with each arm. I then followed that up with a meager seven minutes on my little pedal thingy that's been collecting dust for two years.

My arms now ache, and my legs hurt. But it was actually my back that made me stop pedaling. I'll have to find a different place to sit to utilize the pedals so I don't hurt my back.

There are two 5K runs coming up that I want to do. The last Saturday in January and the first Saturday in February. The one in February is non-negotiable. I did that one last year (my first and last 5K before injury) and want to do it again. I need to find out more about the January 5K to see if I really want to do it.

I've started. And it's time for me to kick it into gear.

fat back

2007-12-30T20:27:00.000-05:00

Two thousand seven found me becoming the fattest I have ever been. I have been disgusted with myself for months. However, due to serious time constraints and over-scheduling, I have been too exhausted and busy to find the time to fit exercise into my daily routine.

This weekend, I noticed my rolls of fat now touch each other. It is a feeling that grosses me out.

And so begins my quest to get rid of my fat back, and everything else.

I have made a commitment with another friend to obtain an exercise goal by May.

How can my husband find me the least bit attractive when I am nothing but a disgusting blob?